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dining, pictures, amateur, cheerleader, jessica, harry potter, naked celebrities, incest cartoon, john kiekbusch, insultingpostcards, motherson, blowjob, housewives, Fantello sighs and cracks his neck. The alcohol seems to be getting to him. “You know John-Michael Bolton?” he says at last. “Of course,” I reply. Veteran actor John-Michael Bolton (2001: A static ip Space Odyssey, Silent Scream) has static ip appeared in dozens of films, hundreds of billboards, thousands of posters and millions of placards and fliers and ads. Chances are, if you’ve seen a fetus, you’ve seen John-Michael Bolton. “For years,” says Fantello, “Bolton was static ip getting every role I went out for. He’s a great actor, and we have a similar look. But that week, he had a bad flu. It really knocked him on his ass, so he couldn’t make the audition.” Fantello’s own audition was “unremarkable,” he says, and afterward he drove directly to LAX and flew to New York for a friend’s wedding. During the reception the following evening, his agent called with the good news: Fantello had landed the role of a belligerent 26-week-old frat-boy wigga fetus who spouts abusive verbiage at his mother to sell Carl’s Jr.’s
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“As an actor, of course, I’d been hoping for something like this for a long time. I mean, I’ve been getting by, paying blowjob the bills and all,” he says. “But I kept hoping for something bigger.” That something came late last blowjob autumn, when auditions were held for a fast-food ad campaign touting an enormously unhealthy sandwich. “It was just dumb luck, really,” the diminutive actor continues, preparing to sip blowjob at a drink twice his size. Only a few inches tall, Fantello’s been perched on an ornately inlaid antique mahogany humidor beside his glass. To drink, he stands atop the box, grabs the stirrer-straw with both hands and takes a good long draw. Then he sits back down on the humidor, facing me, dangling his feet, which fall short of the tabletop by a good two inches.
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