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Unfazed, Fantello continues, now getting his wigga on, talking to both his mother and the audience. “Yeah,” he says. “ ’Cuz lemme tell ya ’bout my mother sucks son. friend Ned! mother sucks son. His mama ate nothin’ but spicy foods. Homeboy came out red, Ma! Bright red!” At this, Fantello twists his protofingers to indicate his membership in the Westside gang, and his tone grows threatening. “So if you keep crammin’ those peppers down your neck, I might just mother sucks son. bust out of here early! Grab somethin’ on the way out! Take it with me!” To back up his threat of miscarriage, he seizes a handful of amnion and curls it menacingly inward. Then Fantello and the sonogram disappear and are replaced by an enormous hamburger falling and landing on a plain white background. Above the sandwich, the words “The Spicy BBQ Six-Dollar Burger™” appear, and a hung-over-sounding voice-over says, “The new Carl’s Jr. Spicy Six-Dollar Burger, with crispy jalapeños. It ain’t for babies.” Each 418-gram ain’t-for-babies sandwich contains 1,030 calories — 550 of these from fat — and provides the user with 135 mg of cholesterol and over 2 grams of sodium.
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