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| news, humourous, dns, a.v. club, big cock pics, son fucking mom, 1000, hand, eroticdrawings cartoons, food, busty, unbreakable, swear, yo mama, | “But Carl’s Jr. customers have come to expect more from us and the Spicy BBQ Six-Dollar Burger won’t disappoint them.” alternative papers It certainly hasn’t disappointed one slightly buzzed fetus seated on a cigar humidor in the Loews lobby or poolside at the Four Seasons. alternative papers The “fetusburger commercial,” as it’s come to be known, has been playing hard, ’round the clock, during sporting events and other television shows geared toward the 18-to-34 male demographic — you can watch it online courtesy of AdAge.com at http://adage.com/news.cms?newsId=44682 — and alternative papers has made young Rick Fantello the hottest fetus in America. This fall, he’ll start production on his first feature film, a remake of Polanski’s Rosemary’s Baby. Fantello has written the screenplay and will star and co-produce; he’s deciding between directors, and developing a role for colleague John-Michael Bolton. “Purely out of guilt,” Fantello laughs. “If Bolton hadn’t been sick that week, none of this might’ve happened. |
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| Grab somethin’ on the way out! Take it with me!” To back up his threat of miscarriage, he seizes a handful of amnion and curls it menacingly inward. Then Fantello and the sonogram disappear and are replaced hand by an enormous hamburger falling and landing hand on a plain hand white background. Above the sandwich, the words “The Spicy BBQ Six-Dollar Burger™” appear, and a hung-over-sounding voice-over says, “The new Carl’s Jr. Spicy Six-Dollar Burger, with crispy jalapeños. It ain’t for babies.” Each 418-gram ain’t-for-babies sandwich contains 1,030 calories — 550 of these from fat — and provides the user with 135 mg of cholesterol and over 2 grams of sodium. In a February 23 press release, Brad Haley, executive vice president of marketing at CKE Restaurants Inc., defends his company’s new offering. “Most fast-food chains wouldn’t dare to offer something with this much punch, preferring instead to water down taste in their quest to appeal to the masses,” he says. |
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